Looking for something...

Lately I been looking for something that I cant seem to find...

Real genuine, 'I'll be there when EVER you need me' friendship, ya know? I'm sure every has that one or more friends you feel that way for or feel that way for you, But lately....

Its just not there for me.

I'm always the after thought. Never the first to be mentioned. Never the first to be called, never the first to be 'invited to the party.'

I guess what I'm saying is, I'm lonely

I have no real connection to anyone anymore. All the time I see the people that once called me there best friend and sister doing everything without me. They don't 'have the time.' or 'the money to come see me'. But yet every other night your out having expensive fun at some ones house?

All I want is a little bit of your time.

I don't need you to buy me 120 dollars worth of weed. I dont need 25 different alcoholic beverages for you to be my company.

Sure every blue moon when you finally have 'the time' I'm happy of out time together. But I wish it was because you tried everything you could to come see me, not because of some coincedence or because you had nothing else better to do that day.

"I'm here for you, you know I love you as much if not more than my other friends."

Then where are you now? Why aren't you here when I feel the worse or just need someone to talk to?

"I have school... I live so far away... I don't have the money to get over there..."

Then why are you always out with everyone else?

Its excuse after excuse. Maybe I'm being a little disagreeable, but at the end of the day your still not here where I need you. Instead your just in the places where people want you