Its weird. Why do I randomly tear up?
Why is it I look at myself and become sad?
I dont understand, what is missing in my life?
What is it I need to make me happy?
I can listen to almost any sad song and relate in ways I dont even consciously realize.
Its like there something, something black buried deep in my heart, behind all the memories, behind all my feelings that I just cant reach, I cant see, I cant feel and yet i know its there. Its always there watching and waiting for the right moment when it can catch me off guard and make me suffer something I cant even comprehend.
I dont know kiddies.... I just dont know
I think I can kind of relate to this feeling... Its like, theres a shroud of darkness lurking inside of me. I have my days of being happy, and joyous, but then theres always the feeling that somethings just there in my heart, waiting, and I can't figure out what it is exactly, but I just know its there, and will come forth sooner or later.
ReplyDeleteI think though, that maybe you should find someone who can really be there for you. Not just physically, but more so mentally. I don't know if that 'shroud' will ever be lifted, but incase it does, it would probably be beneficial to have someone there who'll stick to you when it is lifted and you're at your worst. Or maybe that person will be the one to lift the shroud, and everything will work for the better.